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Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 10:54 AM |
Four clueless fools were spotted in the streets of lower Port Royale today causing wanton destruction and committing acts of vandalism. Horrified merchants and denizens of Port Royale have pleaded for the capture of these terrorists, but alas, the guards of Port Royale have been unable to apprehend the culprits.
The perpetrators have been identified by bystanders as Bel, a Gnomish woman wielding a clawed staff; Sywyn, a white-haired Elf single-mindedly obsessed with crafting; Alis, a healer and follower of Elbereth; and Nadia, a gaudily-dressed woman who makes Candy's fashion sense look positively elegant, modest and tasteful in comparison.
Although the precise details of the incident are still under investigation, the awful mess left behind in the wake of the terrible acts committed by this frightful foursome speak for themselves: the streets are spattered with gore and reek of a terrible, decaying smell, and the market square would have been razed to the ground if not for the perpetual rain.
"I wuz jus' standin' there mindin' me own bizness," reports the traumatised merchant Gariert, "when that Elf, 'e walks up ter the bin and he starts sayin', we's gotta blow it up! Blow it all up!"
"Well, next thing ya knows, they's flingin' spells and fireballs at this bin right next to me stall!" he sobs. "Me stock, how's I gonna git by without me stock? I's gotta make a livin', ya knows... I's already livin' in the slums, I don' wanna live onna streets!"
Fortunately for the victims, the great philanthropist Jessup the Younger has taken swift and decisive action to aid them in their time of need.
"Yeah, he really knows what he's doing," Betty Fish remarks. The fishmonger was amongst the victims, suffering both severe burns from one of the fireballs so carelessly flung by the terrorists, and frostbite from being attacked by magical freeze rays. "Reckon the Queen should knight him for all he's done fer us poor folk over the years. A lot of us owe so much ta him. Now there's someone who really cares and knows how ta show it."
"It's disgraceful," priestess Cydarine remarks. "I've been at the Temple here for seven years and I've never seen such blatant disregard for the welfare and safety of innocents in all my life as today."
One thing's for sure, no one in the lower districts of Port Royale will be willing to deal with these heinous criminals after this incident.
*NO NPC in the lower district of Port Royale will speak with the four characters aforementioned from now on, therefore those PCs should not engage in conversation with any NPCs in those areas; or better yet, just avoid lower Port Royale* |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 10:59 AM |
*below the article in the port are some interviews from some of the populace in the nearby area*
"the stench was horrible, but our devoted sanitation men were able to contain it and clean it up. they surely are the finest and they stink less than most of the nobles."
"what in hell were they doing, playing with the garbage" - Fell Dall - Port Royale sanitation worker |
Purpose in life: finding better ways of allowing players to kill themselves. Repeatedly.
--
"...Cause he mixes it with love
And makes the world taste good."
--
<@James42> Lawful good isn't in your vocabulary, it's on your menu.
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 11:12 AM |
| ((*still laughing uproariously, wondering what the hell these people do in RL when folks put rubbish... in the trash can*)) |
ELVES! |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 11:14 AM |
| ((I eat it, on NHS pay its the best I can get)) |
Nos laetus epulor is quisnam mos onero nos: Dana's family motto, if she had one
(Translation) We gladly feast on he who will oppress us |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 11:50 AM |
| ((It was demons in the trash barrel, DEMONDS I say!! *shakes fist in the air*)) |
IG character: Alis Rapidshill |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 12:01 PM |
| ((let dead heads lie?)) |
Purpose in life: finding better ways of allowing players to kill themselves. Repeatedly.
--
"...Cause he mixes it with love
And makes the world taste good."
--
<@James42> Lawful good isn't in your vocabulary, it's on your menu.
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 02:19 PM |
| Karli lounges in the coffee shop late that evening, a discarded paper in hand. Upon reading the names, she bursts into laughter. Poor Synwyn. Poor Alis! But the description of Nadia was too good to deny herself the smug, triumphant joy of the moment. Karli orders a second mug of coffee and toasts Vilyave. |
"I've got a sword and it's a good one, but all the bleedin' thing can do is keep someone alive, listen. A song can keep someone immortal!" - Cohen the Barbarian |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 06:16 PM |
| ((Honestly, I thought that a spell that deals cold damage would help Betty Fish!!)) |
Me: “Hrothgar is not crazy, he is blessed!”
Wicked Keen/Sa'koless: “Vilyave must have been PMSing when she blessed Hrothgar...” |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 09 Oct 2006 06:44 PM |
((I eat it, on NHS pay its the best I can get))
((Not a Brit, I have no clue what it means, but must be bad!))
*Kal ignores the cries to buy a newspaper as he usually does in the port, but a headline catches his eye. He takes one anyways...*
"Sywyn? BEL?! ALIS?!?! nay, tha canna be right." Shakes his head in disbelief. "An who's this Nadia person... did I meet 'er of late? So many new folks in tha port these days... There mus' be a mistake. Them three wouldn' do a thin like tha. It ain their style."
Then he drops it on the ground and lets it blow along the ground a few feet getting soaked by the rain until it tumbles no further. It collapses under it's own weight until it clings to the cobblestone like a clean shirt as it begins to moisten and cling to a noble's chest on a hot summer day. A pitter-pat can be heard on the paper under the quiet clinking of his armoured green and gold boots of his elven chain as he makes his way to Armani's to finish his projects. |
"Life is a short trip... travel light"
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PC Descriptions with Journal Links |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 10 Oct 2006 02:53 AM |
*the following letter is delivered to PR Tribune by a hawk that seems to think he's a parrot. "Arr me hearties", it screeches as it flies off*
To the Editor,
I am one of the so-called "terrorists" that were so lavishly blamed for everything that happened in Port yesterday, and I don't think the press has been very fair towards us. One important thing has been left out: we were trying to prevent something bad from happening. I admit that it didn't go too well, but it could've been much worse. Earlier that day, a red-eyed man dropped things into that barrel – things that we later identified as demon heads. After doing this, he ran off as fast as if hell-beasts were at his heels. Clearly this indicates that he knew his deed would cause havoc and distress. After the man was gone, the place was swarmed with flies and the barrel started acting strangely. It disappeared and reappeared from our sight, and we had no choice but to take action before it would get any worse. Who knows, maybe the demons were not really dead, or maybe a portal was opening up? Whatever the case, we didn't want demons running rampant in Port. Burning the remains felt like a good idea at the time.
We had no idea that it would cause such a mess, and for that, I apologise. I was trying my best to help Gariert and Betty, risking my own life in doing so, and it saddens me deeply that they have chosen to ignore that. I hope the citizens of lower Port will forgive us, as our actions were dictated by good intentions.
Alis Rapidshill |
IG character: Alis Rapidshill |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 10 Oct 2006 03:16 AM |
*a group of citizens are standing around reading the latest paper. Some of the following comments can clearly be heard.*
"...tried to 'elp, did they?..."
"...fireballing the entire market was 'elpful, was it?..."
"...freezing the fish monger after setting her on fire...ok, that makes a kind of twisted sense..."
"...aye, heroes like this, who needs enemies...?"
"...beware, the garbage man cometh..."
"...Mr. Jessup woulda known what ta do.."
"..but you don't understand..that garbage barrel was ...vicious!..."
"...I guess they didn't like the smell...it's like they never smelled their own feces before..."
"...mom always told me never to play in the garbage..."
"...the great garbage war..."
*The voices range from outrage, to genuine mirth to the antics of our, now well known, heros* |
Purpose in life: finding better ways of allowing players to kill themselves. Repeatedly.
--
"...Cause he mixes it with love
And makes the world taste good."
--
<@James42> Lawful good isn't in your vocabulary, it's on your menu.
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 10 Oct 2006 03:49 AM |
Valethrion strokes his Pseudodragon Familiar slowly as he reviews her gift of a copy of the Port Royale Tribune. From the near-solitude of the gardens maintained by the Order of the Seven Sisters, he reads the article with narrowed eyes.
"Funny, Evelana. There is no mention of the disgusting things that came forth from the barrel. No mention of the unbearable stench, nor of the paralysis that struck afterwards. Humans can be so asinine at times."
Evelana growls quietly in agreement, then curls around herself a bit more in his lap.
"Still," he continues, heedless of Evelana's thoughts itching at the back of his mind. "This explains a lot. Quite frankly, though, I am shocked. Eibellenith was a part of this from the beginning, as was Sywyn. I suppose you never really know someone; I'm almost disappointed."
Evelana growls again, then starts scratching lightly at Valethrion's robes. Valethrion, in turn, taps the Pseudodragon's head.
"Now, stop that. I have precious little to wear these days; my own robes still reek. Not to mention the blood I coughed up."
Valethrion winces slightly in rememberance, then shakes his head sadly. "Still, a few more days of vigorous washing will remove any ill smell. How you can still stand it is beyond me."
Evelana snorts quietly, then closes her eyes and feigns sleep.
Valethrion sighs, shakes his head, then removes two sheets of blank parchment, an inkpot, and a quill from his thankfully stench-free pack, and sets to writing.
The first letter is a personal one, and thus unaddressed to any sort of public figure.
The second letter, however:
To the Editor of the Port Royale Tribune,
I am appalled at the treatment your most recent article has bestowed on the people mentioned in said article.
It is, quite frankly, disgusting. Moreso than even the contents of the trash barrel in question. As a bystander and, further, an educated and -informed- member of society, I openly dispute the statements issued by the merchants of Port Royale.
Had they known what was in there; I am sure they would be thanking these four people for saving their lives, rather than chiding them.
Furthermore, I am acquainted with three of these people; and a good friend of fourth. All of which strike me as responsible and outgoing members of society; people that did their best, despite their ignorance at what could or would happen.
I do not pretend to have extensive knowledge of demonic anatomy; however, I feel it is safe to say even in death, a demon would still be able to effect death upon others.
I believe an apology is due here. An apology and a show of gratitude for these four people; and another woman that saved several people, myself included.
Signed,
Valethrion Veziel |
WE APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 10 Oct 2006 03:45 PM |
To the citizens of the Port,
P&J Enterprises would like to state that we do not condone actions such as the ones that occured the other day. We love our city and its citizens. While accidents do happen we also realise that there are people and creatures of great power who wield it irresponsibly. We are not condemning said offendents and ask you to please show compassion to them until a complete explanation can be heard. We know to well how rumors and lies spread. We ask you to show patience in this matter and towards those responsible. In order to help with this situation P&J would like to offer the sanitation workers resposible for the clean up a hefty bonus of 500 gold pieces per worker for thier hard work in the clean up. P&J woul also like to replensih the stock of Gariert and offer him a brand new stall. We would also like to purchase Betty a brand new fish cart and offer her a complete new ardrobe from Armani. At P&J nothing is more important than the great people of the Port! No one knows this better than P&J who have been established here for many years and look forward to many, many more!
Thank you
P&J Enterprises. |
ONWARD AND UPWARD! |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 10 Oct 2006 07:39 PM |
To the Editors of the Port Royal Whatever,
let this be a leson to evryone in Port Royale and evrywhere els: thats Naruthians for you. I know this Nadia woman and she is so Naruthian its a wunder she doesn't erupt into flames when she farts. Consider that there is an alliance between Naruth and Midoran. its no secret that a sertin riteious sword by the name of Sanners has been making clames to set up a church of inquisiton here in the north. Dowtless this was a deliberit act of destruction meant to weaken the city, cause mass chaos and give Sanners an argument to allow the crimson creeps to come in and bring Midoran law to port Royale!!!!
synwyn is a sweety as elfs go. he was probably trying to stop Nadia but she is repootedly very powerful. how else could she get away with dressing as badly as she does?
Alis is also a nice person and as a follwr of elbreth she probably thinks garbage cans are a good idea because they keep the trsh out of the water and woods. Also does not like naruthians but then again who does?
I do not know the gnome. I can only imagine that she was being bullied because everyone knows how manipoolative and mean spirited naruthians are.
its a shame whats happend though. and so close to small stones! who knose if the children mite have been hurt!??! it is a good thing that the citizens of Port Royal were so proactive and stalwert in their love of their town. it is the commoonity of Port Royal that makes it such a grate city to live in. In the future, however, I would suggest that naruthians be carefully watched.
May freedom endure in Port Royal!
To my biggest fan,
Karli Goodfellow.
*the letter is punctuated with a great many little hearts and flower-like shapes, with small drawings of expressive "smiley" faces in the margins to denote the mood of the sentences* |
"I've got a sword and it's a good one, but all the bleedin' thing can do is keep someone alive, listen. A song can keep someone immortal!" - Cohen the Barbarian |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 10 Oct 2006 08:49 PM |
[From Katya Moonbear to the Editor of the local Rag]
Having come across friends and acquaintances laying stricken in the streets in a cloud of vile puss, plus the fish seller Betty, the shop keeper Garriet, and the ox cart driver and his ox, all of whom I valiantly aided at great risk to my personal safety I am somewhat surprised at the vitriol and the lies that are unkindly being spread about the city against the named.
Here are a few facts to clarify the situation as I saw it.
1/ None of Mr Garriet’s wares were missing or damaged as I happened to witness a purchase shortly after the incident.
2/ Having cleansed the area with the aid of the mother Elbereth ‘to whom I prayed before attempting to call down the wind’ the so called sanitation expert so lauded in the paper was fool enough to open the barrel twice more causing me to again cleanse the area and disperse the vile cloud of puss with the power of the wind. This fool ‘nay this stupid and idiotic incompetent sanitation amateur’ then proceeded to berate all about him and never said a word of thanks to myself for cleaning up his mess.
3/ No word has been mentioned of the powerful spells of restorative magic that I and Alis cast upon the citizens after I cleared the cloud which so laid them low.
As is usual in this city the so called guards [and workforce in general] are slovenly and lacking in any work ethic otherwise they would be in hot pursuit of the red eyed man who so endangered the citizens by placing the demon heads in the barrel in the first place.
In other words ‘the locals are looking for an easy way to expunge their own incompetence by blaming those who tried to aid them in their hour of need’.
Perhaps a little apology and a retraction of the accusations might be in order. Oh and a ‘Thank you Katya Moonbear for cleaning up our streets and saving our lives’ would not go amiss either. |
Love 'n' light
Wings |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 03 Nov 2006 08:46 PM |
*the letter is punctuated with a great many little hearts and flower-like shapes, with small drawings of expressive "smiley" faces in the margins to denote the mood of the sentences* -Karlina Godfellow ((per "Marlina"))
((ROFLMFAO. I'd expect no less of a Vilyavian. Fun IC add!!!))
-K.I. |
"Life is a short trip... travel light"
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PC Descriptions with Journal Links |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 20 Nov 2006 01:05 PM |
| ((Are we going to be forever unwelcome in lower Port?)) |
IG character: Alis Rapidshill |
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 20 Nov 2006 01:10 PM |
| ((no, no... by now, I guess you could say that the stink has blown over)) |
Purpose in life: finding better ways of allowing players to kill themselves. Repeatedly.
--
"...Cause he mixes it with love
And makes the world taste good."
--
<@James42> Lawful good isn't in your vocabulary, it's on your menu.
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Re: Vandals run rampant in Port Royale!
Posted: 20 Nov 2006 09:54 PM |
| ((Life would be so much less exciting without puns.)) |
Me: “Hrothgar is not crazy, he is blessed!”
Wicked Keen/Sa'koless: “Vilyave must have been PMSing when she blessed Hrothgar...” |
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