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DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 22 Apr 2005 12:55 PM |
*in a barely legible scrawl posted on noticeboards throughout Buckshire and Port Royale*
McGillicutty's Inn (i.e. me.... don't tell the missus) is proud to announce it's first waitress selection interviews (i.e . beauty contest) will be held on Sunday 1st May at 4pm GMT.
Prize is a year's employment, wages paid in advance, and a free uniform.
Everybody is welcome. Refreshments available from the bar.
Doc M |
ELVES! |
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RE: DM Event
Posted: 25 Apr 2005 03:06 AM |
A bulky Dwarven lady squinted at the scrawled note pinned to the Trading Post noticeboard and scratched at her stubbly beard.
"See? There. Therrrre!" said a rather manic Gnome dressed in garish green and orange robes.
The Dwarf nodded to him. "S'pose you'll be there t'chat up the contestants, huh, Tok?"
"Heyyy. Yeah, Keg, I could do that." Tok looked thoughtful for a moment, then bit the Dwarf on the elbow.
"Oiii! Ya crazy Gnome, gitoff. Off!"
The Dwarf shook her arm about to dislodge him, but she may as well have tried to dislodge a bear trap. Nothing could pry off Tok once he got going. With a sigh, she reached over with her free hand and pinched his nose, causing him to squeak momentarily in protest.
"I wfs fnking yu cd nntr," Tok said in a muffled voice.
From beside them, a Half-Orc looked up from the set of pan-pipes he was studying. "Me not waitress!" Gorg protested.
"I mnt Jhgnr." Tok did his best to shoot an irritated look at the Half-Orc out of the corner of his eye.
Jagnar tweaked Tok's nose, making him flail his arms about wildly.
"I dunno, Tok... it wouldn' be a fair competition then." Jagnar grinned and struck a pose. Or at least, she did her best to do so, what with a Gnome attached to her elbow by his teeth. "Heck, there'd be no competition. I'd win easy."
"Yyr's weiyjez," said Tok, still clamped to her elbow.
"Shiniez to win," said Gorg, and tried to puff into his pan-pipes to produce a merry tune. As usual, the sound that came out was a series of windy huffs.
Jagnar considered and turned her attention back to the note.
"Free uniform," she said, and that decided it. "Sure. Yeah. I c'n do that." |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 25 Apr 2005 08:00 PM |
*Pergha brushes the twigs and leaves and other things from her long thick hair, a broad grin covering her thick jawed orcish face as she recalled overhearing news of the waitress selection interviews.*
Dis bees da big funz YUS. Dems picks da pruttiuzt gurlz YUS. Perghas haf getz new druss dis un no covur much ! *looks down at the very skimpy see through evening gown wistfully, before her face lights up excitedly* Hmm maybe dat makes dem see more da boody((*note* boody as in beauty, not boody as in a misspelled version of any slang term for a backside.)) YUS !!
*Grinning excitedly, Pergha begins walking off before stopping, a look of confusion on her broad features.* Wut dem watruss doos? Oh wellz wes seez !! |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 25 Apr 2005 11:18 PM |
Oh god...the humanity!
*begins pouring bleach into his ear hoping to cleanse his mind of the image of Pergha in a skimpy see through gown*
...someone hold me...I'm scared...
-V |
I'm The Cult of Personality. |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 29 Apr 2005 03:03 PM |
Gnimini, the good hearted but devious little gnome, notices this post on one of his frequents to Buckshire, while carrying a (much to) heavy load of Cougar Hides.
"i'll havta remind me Jubei of this...maybe leave out just a few MINOR details (of some of the potential contestants he had heard rumors of)...maybe we can find him a woman."
"C'mon, Yummie," he says to his kitty-friend, and heads off to work the leather. |
-Gnimini // gnomish wizard facinated with tailoring
-Mirg // young human ranger
-Dredger Hack'nchant // dwarven spellsword
-Hallelujah // gnomish singer and songwriter
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"i just can't wait till this squirrel mating season is over, those bug |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 01 May 2005 06:43 AM |
| ((Bumped)) That's today at 4pmish UK time |
ELVES! |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 01 May 2005 02:27 PM |
A quick thanks to all who turned up, contestants and judges. Haven't laughed so much in a long time. Thanks especially to the ladies who turned up to rescue Doc from Jagnar *shudders*.
Oh and feel free to order drinks, cleaning up, whatever from Juylina if you should happen to spot her there - she's been paid a year in advance *grins*. |
ELVES! |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 01 May 2005 02:58 PM |
Bunt was robbed!
lol
-V |
I'm The Cult of Personality. |
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Re: DM EVENT: ****By popular demand****
Posted: 01 May 2005 04:21 PM |
Thanks especially to the ladies who turned up to rescue Doc from Jagnar *shudders*.
Yes, for if they had not turned up, he would have passed out from being overwhelmed by her magnificent beauty. :p
She still has those two costumes, har har har. Be afraid. Be VERY afraid. |
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